Hypochondria
by Soapytoast
Summary: Alfred is has very mild hypochondria, which would be fine if he didn't keep calling everyone up late at night when he thinks something simple like a headache has turned into something much more serious. (Mentions of serious illness and hypochondira in lighthearted sense)


The bright screen illuminated him in the darkness. Alfred knew he should be sleeping, but with a what he was sure was a full blown migraine was keeping him awake. That, and the paranoia.

He grabbed his phone from the bedside table, flicking through his contacts. He needed to talk to someone. Perhaps Arthur would listen?

The phone rang for a few painful seconds, the finally the groggy voice appeared on the other end, "Hello? … Alfred, do you even know what bloody time it is?"

He paused, to look at the clock at the bottom of the screen.

"Ah, sorry! It's nearly one, but it's really-" he was cut off by a loud groan

"Did you really forget about the time difference again?! It's quarter to bloody six in the morning here," Arthur mumbled something that sounded distinctly like 'you git' which Alfred chose to ignore.

"C'mon Artie, it's important. I think I might be having a brain aneurysm! It's definitely that or a tumour…"

"What? Why the hell are you calling me then, call an ambulance you idiot!"

Beep beep beep. Arthur had hung up.

For a moment he considered calling an ambulance as suggested. Then he remembered, with the time difference it would most likely be day time in Japan, he could call Kiku.

"Herro, Alfred-san?"

"Hey! Kiku, how are you doing?"

"Very well, thank you. I apologize, this call must be very expensive. Would you prefer to use internet call later?"

"No problem, it's fine. I just wanted a quick chat."

"I see," he could hear the man seemed outside somewhere busy.

"Alright, I guess I should start with the big stuff. I think I might have a brain tumour."

There was a long pause, "Sorry, the line is not good. I don't mean to trouble you. Goodbye."

It was weird, the line had seemed very clear from his end. He continued to search his contacts for someone to call. There was no way he was calling Ivan, even if the guy answered him just the thought made him feel cold or perhaps that was just a new symptom? He made a note to google it later.

He was left between Francis and Matthew. Francis would definitely speak to him, but the guy was just super annoying.

He tapped the screen and listened to the familiar dialling tone.

"Hey, Mattie!"

"Al? What are you calling so late aboot?" His brother's voice was comforting and quiet. Alfred knew he'd made the right choice.

"Mattie," he could feel his lip tremble slightly as he spoke, "I think I might have a brain tumor… or an aneurysm…" he began to wail down the line. What if this was the last chance he had to speak to his brother?

"Al…" Matthew waited patiently, "Al."

"...what?"

"Been using symptom checker again, eh?

"Yeah, but, but this time I'm sure. I've got a headache, I'm feeling sick and it's actually kind of painful to be looking into light, I think I'm just having a problem with my eyes too."

"What did you last eat?"

Alfred thought back, he'd had a double hamburger, large fries, extra large shake and ice cream for dinner. As well as a couple slices of pizza for a snack an hour before bed. "I've been eating like normal, y'know I had a burger and some pizza…"

"You feel sick because you probably ate too much before bed, eh?" It seemed strangely logical when Matthew put it like that, "and I bet you've been staring at your laptop with the lights off again, that's why your eyes hurt. Don't you think it could just be a normal headache?"

"I… I guess you're right! Wow. Thanks Mat!"

"No problem, you're always worrying like this. Good night Al."

"G'night Mattie!"

Matthew sighed, Arthur and Kiku had already both sent him messaged letting him know Al was having another one of his moments. Last time he suspected his weight gain to be due to polycystic ovaries, it had taken him an hour to convince him that as a man he didn't even have ovaries.

 **AN: I should probably point out that the Alfred in this story is definitely a known hypochondriac. If you have do suspect you might have a more serious illness then go to your doctor! Don't be ashamed of using things like either to check your symptoms and suggest that you might have something other than what the doctor might think -** **I actually would like to personally dedicate this to someone who often accused me of being a hypochondriac, right before I was diagnosed with a chronic illness!**


End file.
